Kakkiola Republic - The Republic of Isle
Kakkiola is an island in the Mediterranean Sea which, having been in contact with Greek culture has preferred to distort the democratic principles for a return to the policies and tyrannical liberticide guaranteeing the impunity of criminals and corrupt and deny justice to the people.
A) The self-appointed prime minister in January 2009, Dr. Melarido the Commendatore.
B) Capital: Kakkiola
C) Chairman of the Board: Dr John Melarido
D) Other Cities: Perk, Puzzaldi, Santapecorina
E) Kakkiola - Population: 1,200,000 hab.
F) Size: 1,800 sq km, or slightly more than the extension of Rome.
G) Population: 1.2 million inhabitants, Kakkiolani the population is of uncertain origin.
H) Language: The official language is Italian island, but residents in their daily life, speak the dialect. Italian is used within the administration.
I) Religion: Most of religion is Kakkiolani Berlusconi (52%). Over 150 temples are reserved for their cults and major religious festivals bring together hundreds of thousands of faithful. Catholics (26%), Muslim (16%), Protestant (2%), and a handful of Buddhists who themselves have their places of worship.
L) Currency: The official currency is the euroberl (EB). Credit cards (MerderCard, Viska, American Fitness) and travelers checks are accepted in hotels and department stores. In all major centers are located ATMs. In banks, the withdrawal of cash with an ATM is easy and fast.
M) Climate and seasons: The dry season from September to November, followed by the big rainy season from December to April and the short rainy season from May to August. Cyclone period: from November to March.
N) Virus: An Outbreak of Virus Berluskaz (a type of dengue fever or red) is currently under surveillance in the Sea of \u200b\u200bKakkiola. The outbreak originated in the islands Ciola in February 2005 and was later extended to the island and all of Kakkiola ' Isola delle Imbrattate. Si tratta di una malattia che si sviluppa soprattutto vicino alle coste (non è stata riscontrata in zone di montagna). Trasmessa dalle zanzare, questa affezione –benigna– è caratterizzata da una forte febbre e dolori articolari. Consultare un medico in caso di comparsa dei sintomi. Prestate attenzione ai chioschi dei venditori ambulanti che propongono i tipici silviocrem al peperoncino e berluspepper. Si rischia di prendere la turista (diarrea del viaggiatore).
O) Telefono :
P) Per chiamare l'isola di Kakkiola dall'Italia, comporre lo 00 + BERL999 + il numero del destinatario.
Q) Per chiamare l'Italia da Kakkiola, comporre lo 00 BERL777 + numero desiderato.
Agenda :
- Febbraio, Berluskashow.
- Marzo, Festa serale: Stupri a GOGO.
- 12 marzo, Festa in onore degli Onorevoli Corrotti (festa nazionale).
- Fine marzo, Megafesta con Megaconcerto per chi delinque nella Repubblica di Kakkiola (festa Kakkiolese).
- 1° maggio, Festa di chi non lavora (che non fa un cazzo).
- 15 agosto, Inno ai Ministri Corrotti - Orchestra dei Mafiosi dell'Isola di Kakkiola.
- 9 settembre, Festa in onore dei Camorristi dell'Isola di Kakkiola.
- Novembre, Festa della luce, quella che la Repubblica di Kakkiola non farà mai vedere realmente ai Kakkiolani ma vedere, in realtà, solo artificialmente.
- 1° novembre, Ognissanti, compreso San Silvio e San Kakkavale.
- 25 dicembre, Natale organizzato direttamente dal Presidente del Consiglio della Repubblica di Kakkiola.
Altre notizie utili :
1) Informazioni sull'aereoporto : L'aeroporto internazionale KAKKIOL AIR si trova nel sud dell'isola, a 7 km da KAKKIOLA. Calcolate circa 25 euroberl (EB) in taxi fino alla capitale KAKKIOLA e circa 10 euroberl (EB) in pullman.
2) Elettricità : 220 V. Prese continentali a due spine o inglesi a tre spine. Portate un adattatore.
3) Sicurezza : Fate attenzione ai borseggiatori nei mercati ma non sottovalutate nemmeno the RUM (risk rapes of women and anal sex for men). On the beaches no problem. The hotels often have a guard but usually is not worth a shit, which was responsible for regulating the wave of street vendors. The Kakkiolani are pretty quiet, but as elsewhere, be careful if you come out at night alone. The laws of this country are disgusting and is the President of the Council and Parliament have no intention of changing the laws in force, in fact.
to read, see, you know, to do, to listen
1) Traditions and customs: I have a good sense of humor Kakkiolani among others, the President of the Republic has the gift of laughter to the sbellicare So the people always laugh kakkiolani (nonostante i problemi).
2) Circolare nella zona : Un servizio di nave da carico che prende a bordo sia veicoli che passeggeri, opera tra Kakkiola e L'Italia. I tragitti vengono effettuati fino a due volte a settimana. Consultare gli orari.
3) In automobile : I taxi applicano una tariffa "europea". Esiste anche la possibilità di noleggiare un veicolo a due ruote. La guida è a sinistra e le strade sono in condizioni relativamente buone. Il limite di velocità è di 40 km/h in zona urbana, e di 80 km/h fuori. Prudenza sulle stradine dell'isola. Non sono mai molto larghe e a volte sono piene di buche il Presidente della Repubblica di Kakkiola non ha nessuna intenzione di spendere soldi per rattoppare le buche ma prefers to enlarge the villas owned by him with those.
4) Food: Behind the kitchen there is Kakkiolana meat, fish and vegetables and of course all products by the President of the Council.
5) Shopping: Kakkiola, duty-free island. One of the souvenirs to take home is a plaster statue of our Prime Minister. Other typical purchase: Used panties of the Prime Minister, that you can get to market Kakkiola.
6) Volume of tourist influx: In 2005, the island of Kakkiola has received 800,000 tourists.
7) Taxes and gratuities: On the local prices are applied to a government tax of 4% and 10% VAT. Tipping is widely diffused but is not mandatory (nb The Prime Minister always pick qalche mites on tips of poor people. It 's a bad habit but its abtudini has a lot of shit)
Republic of Kakkiola -
Constitution Article 1
Kakkiola is a Democratic Republic (but not always), not based on the work, allowing the powerful to deceive, and impunity. The sovereignty belongs to the people, apparently, sometimes to some asshole of power and is exercised in the appearances of this Constitution.
Article 2 The Republic of Kakkiola recognizes and guarantees the inviolable rights of man, but it is often legitimized a buck off completely.
Articolo 3
Tutti i cittadini hanno pari dignità sociale e sono eguali davanti alla legge, senza distinzione di sesso, di razza, di lingua, di religione, di opinioni politiche, di condizioni personali e sociali ma in molti casi ci si strafotte di tutto ciò andando in culo a chi non ha mezzi per difendersi.È compito della Repubblica rimuovere gli ostacoli di ordine economico e sociale, che, limitando di fatto la libertà e l'eguaglianza dei cittadini, impediscono il pieno sviluppo della persona umana e l'effettiva partecipazione di tutti i lavoratori all'organizzazione politica, economica e sociale del Paese ma non sempre.
Articolo 4
La Repubblica riconosce a tutti i cittadini il right to work and promotes conditions to fulfill this right, however, the work can not be guaranteed tutti.Ogni citizen has a duty to perform according to their ability and individual choice, activity or function that contributes to the material or spiritual society.
Article 5
The Republic, one and indivisible, recognizes and promotes local autonomies, and implements services that depend on the State the fullest measure of administrative decentralization accords the principles and methods of its legislation to the requirements of autonomy and decentralization . But everything is subject to the desires and projects of the Prime Minister of the Republic of Kakkiola.
Article 6
The Republic protects linguistic minorities with special rules.
Article 7 The Republic of Kakkiola uses a Parliament without any decision making authority as is reserved to the Prime Minister and Ministers shall be limited simply to give their names to rules adopted by the President (for his own use and consumption ) otherwise the unit from the office.
Article 8
The Republic promotes the development of culture and scientific research and tecnica.Tutela the landscape and the historical and artistic heritage of the nation, however, tolerate the construction of the landscape of state property or property belonging to political fixer.
Article 9
The laws of the Republic of Kakkiola does not comply with generally recognized norms of international law as it is totally independent and always modificabile.La legal status of foreigners is regulated by law in conformity with international norms and treaties, but only in some casi.Lo alien who is denied his country in the effective exercise of democratic freedoms guaranteed by the Constitution of the Republic of Kakkiola has the right of asylum in the territory of the Republic as laid down by law. That means they can commit crimes without getting galera.Non not allow the extradition of a foreigner for crimes politic even for rape, murder and altre brutture.
Articolo 10
La Repubblica di Kakkiola ripudia la guerra come strumento di offesa alla libertà degli altri popoli e come mezzo di risoluzione delle controversie internazionali; consente, in condizioni di parità con gli altri Stati, alle limitazioni di sovranità necessarie ad un ordinamento che assicuri la pace e la giustizia fra le Nazioni; promuove e favorisce le organizzazioni internazionali rivolte a tale scopo. Può, però mandare soldati in guerra a morire sotto la voce di esportare democrazia in altri stati.
Articolo 11
La bandiera della Repubblica di Kakkiola è di colore Marrone che simboleggia a pieno titolo il colore della defecazione.
Repubblica of Kakkiola - Prime
The Dr.Giovanni Melarido is Chairman of the Council of Ministers of the Republic of Kakkiola.
Interview
1
Question: Dr.Giovanni Melarido Prime Minister of the Republic of Kakkiola on its descent into politics.
Answer: I am head of the government and for the first time in fifty years I have maximum control over the Parliament.
2
Question: Why has entered into politics?
Answer: I entered politics with great pleasure, because I thought that the extreme Left would be a disaster for the State of Kakkiola. The Left parties controlled 34 percent of votes, but they had more than 80 percent of the seats in Parliament. I was the most popular man in Kakkiola company created out of nothing because I've been leading a popular movement, and people said, you're our only hope of not having a government of the Left.
3
Question: Why all the commentators attack him?
Answers: I think there is jealousy in these people because I can not find another explanation. Influential journalists - were older than me and they believed them to be as important in our relationship. Then the ratio was reversed and I have become what they themselves wanted to be. So, since I have them politically related, has developed an irrational Kakkiolesi very popular among journalists.
4
Question: Dr.Melarido says he has a model in Mrs. Thatcher, but he is really leading a revolution in Kakkiola Thatcher?
Answer: I am a great admirer of Mrs. Thatcher, but I read in his biography that during his years as she has done very little. I had great difficulty with the bicameral system Kakkiolano, and I discuss everything with my coalition partners. ...... I inherited a country in its old structures and its institutions. Kakkiola now has a very good business class. A State old, obsolete, with a bloated public administration, inefficient and very expensive has now become a country fully meets the needs of the Head of Government. The public works continue to go on and to give money to contractors, such as the bridge over the Strait of Kakkiola you give government money to criminal groups Kakkiolani. They've been able to digitize our government and make state control is the most widespread in Mediterraneo.Ebbene, now I'm happy, I am the master of Kakkiola Kakkiolani and are finally happy.
5
Question: Dr.Melarido on the Middle East ...
Answer: It is a fact that in the Middle East is not true and I think this state intervention in Iraq as positive Capisco la difficoltà di insegnare la dittatura a gente che ha conosciuto solo la democrazia.
6
Domanda : Potrebbe essere così bello
Risposta : Ero a scuola dai Barnabiti e un giorno alcuni preti che erano fuggiti superando la cortina di ferro vennero a trovarci, e ci dissero del terrore e che i comunisti mangiavano i bambini. Tutto questo all'età di 12 anni mi impressionò e pensai che da grande avrei imposto un governo mio personale nel quale i lecchini avrebber fatto molta strada e tutti avrebbero eseguito le mie volontà.
7
Domanda: Imporre Libertà e Democrazia
Risposta : Imporre Libertà e Democrazia è necessario in tutto il mondo perchè la libertà crea beni materiali. Soprattutto se questi beni vanno ad uno solo e al suo seguito è una buona cosa.
8
Domanda: Perché Il Liberist Time crede che Lei non sia adatto a governare l'Italia?
Risposta : Liberist Time ha fatto un grande e fondamentale errore confondendo le guardie con i ladri. Ha preso i protettori della democrazia e della libertà per i ladri, e ha preso i ladri per le guardie. Ha mescolato tutto. Non ho mai guadagnato un soldo nella mia vita dalla politica. Ho messo i miei soldi nella politica, sì, per finanziare VIVA KAKKIOLA. E per il conflitto di interessi me ne frego perché tutto il mio sistema di grandi negozi è rimasto nelle mie mani.
E' just pass laws to save the processes?
You must understand that I had over 500 visits by the Guardia di Finanza to my group, I've had more than 90 investigations. You have to ask, what is the remedy if an entire power of attorney to Kakkiola does is invent theorems about me? What is the remedy if they keep asking me to go to court, or continue to let me have meetings with my lawyers? The remedy is to make laws to my advantage.
Republic of Kakkiola-
Ministries President of the Council of Ministers Dr. John Melarido
Treasury Rag. Matthew holed pocket
Ministry of Labour Sig: Terence lazy
Foreign Ministry in January Natalino France Ministry of Transport
PI Enrico Maria Binary
Ministry of Public Works Building Geom.Mario
Sig.Paolo Balance Trade Ministry of the Interior Ministry
Ten.Col.Emilio Safety Pin
Ministry of Health Ministry of Finance Dr.Nicola Flebo
Rag. Umberto Euro
Ministry of Education Prof.Stellina Ciuca
Ministry of Justice Ministry of Agriculture Avv.Mariolino Libra
Sig.Daniele Watermelon
Ministry of Communications Sig.Ivan Siptel
Gen.Ippazio Loverde
Ministry of Defence Ministry of Heritage and Culture Prof.Beato Speech
Ministry for the Environment Dr.Giacomina Dirty Pretty in
Ministry of Public Administration Dr. Robert Blonde
Ministry of Equal Opportunities Dr.Maria Zampogna
Republic of Kakkiola -
Parliament Parliament is the legislative body of the state, which is a complex organ, consisting essentially of one or more corporate bodies of type 'Meeting (room) in our case it is a single room, which is that of Representatives, one-party, whose primary function in the specific case of the Republic of Kakkiola passing laws is only made by the Prime Minister.
01 - Rag.Matteo pocket holed
02 - Sig: Terence lazy
03 - Gen.Natalino
France 04 - Maria PIEnrico
Track 05 - Building Geom.Mario
06 - Sig.Paolo Balance
07 - Safety Pin Ten.Col.Emilio
08 - Dr.Nicola Flebo
09 - Rag.Umberto
Euro 10 - Prof.Stellina Ciuca
11 - Libra Avv.Mariolino
12 - Watermelon Sig.Daniele
13 - Mr. Ivan Siptel
14 - Gen.Ippazio Loverde
15 - Cloud Prof.Beato
16 - Dirty Pretty in Dr.Giacomina
17 - Dr. Robert
Blonde 18 - Sega Ing.Benedetto
19 - Ins.Mario Scatafascio
20 - Prof . Dr.Giacomo Alverde
21 - Prof.Avv.Michele indifference
22 - Ins.Adelina Pugnetto
23 - Ms. Francamaria pump
24 - Sig.Donato Fregherò
25 - Arch.Ada Pompinais
26 - Mrs. Margaret Lafregna
27 - Geom.Francesco
Size 28 - Rag.Angelantonio Mastro
29 - Sig.Agata Loporcu
30 - Dr.Silvestro Telomeno
Kakkiola Republic of - Judicial Single - FROG Federation of gays Gaudenti:
Secretary: Rag.Nicolavito Loser
Via Hoof Old No. 69 - Island Kakkiola
email: frog.federazione . froci.gaudenti @ kakkiola.it
Statute of Judicial FROG:
1) FROG It aims to protect the interests of workers without racial, religious or political prejudice the decisions of the Prime Minister to the detriment of workers.
2) The National Secretary shall hold office until the Chairman of the Board so decides
3) The National Secretary is elected by the Council President. Carefully keeping the books and makes the economic and financial accounts to the President of the Council approves it.
4) The operation of the Syndicate is driven largely voluntary commitment of members.
Republic of Kakkiola States - Friends
1] United States of Bananas - President: Barakka Rakke
2] Parakulistan Republic of - President: Ando Kazzowai
text: eoalvin trip (Piero Villani)
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